Extroverts have feelings too. If you’ve followed me for a while (and many of you reading this have…thank you) you know that I have done lots of training and hosted workshops and podcasts with Certified Personality Trainer Vickie Musni.
You may even classify me as an extrovert, and you’d be right. I’m here to tell you that all personality types, including extroverts, have feelings too. Why this topic?
After a couple of recent exchanges over the last month or so, it really hit home to me that while some may think extroverts are brash and bold and have a tough exterior, that they may also think that we don’t feel. That is 100% NOT TRUE. Think of an extrovert in your life. Are they also sensitive? Have you ever seen them completely blow up?
I know for a fact that I can come across very abrasive sometimes (maybe you’re like me too in that way). It’s important to understand that everyone is going through things in life and that if you “poke the bear” too much, the bear may BLOW. UP. Not good.
It’s for this reason that I firmly believe it’s important to understand personalities as much as possible. Let me give you an example.
Recently I was on vacation in HAWAII (I’m in Hawaii…it’s absolutely gorgeous, perfect temperature, sun shining…) and I blew up at my lifelong friends we were vacationing with…and it wasn’t good. I look back at it and I think “That’s just stupid! Why the hell did I do that?” You have to cut yourself some slack sometimes and realize that things are going to go south in life sometimes, that’s just life. Looking back on it, I had received some very negative news in my life shortly before that trip and I carried that with me all the way over to Hawaii and let that affect not only my friends but my vacation with my family. Why did I let it affect that time and space in my life? Because negative news also affected my family, and I care very deeply about them.
If you’re an extrovert like me, have a short fuse or wear your feelings on your sleeve, or maybe you’re an introvert and you let things just build up until they BLOW UP, what can you do?
- Take a step back. Breathe. Know that in the end if it’s not life or death, it’s small stuff. Don’t get so consumed with it.
- Find another way to let off steam that doesn’t affect your fellow humans. Maybe you channel that energy into something productive with your life such as a workout, run, or just a walk to clear your head.
- Come back to the situation with a clear mind ready to tackle it when you have your thoughts back in order.
BONUS: If you do blow up, know that your TRUE friends will also realize that it’s the only human condition and they’ll (hopefully) forgive you. I know that I’m thankful my TRUE friends were able to have a conversation with me about it and move forward with our friendship.
The bottom line, ALL personalities have feelings. They just handle them differently.
Everyone is struggling with something underneath the exterior they show to the world on a daily basis. You have your own challenges, they have theirs. This is not holier than thou thing, I’ve certainly rub people the wrong way over the years and probably will again at some point like today. 🙂 Be kind. Have that thought in your mind as you move forward as you grow forward in your life and your business.